I know it...You also know it
I know it...You do not know it.
I do not know it...You know it
I do not know it...You also do not know it.
======================================================================================I know it...You do not know it.
I do not know it...You know it
I do not know it...You also do not know it.
There are only two things to worry about
Either you are well or sick
If you are well, then there is nothing to worry about
But if you are sick, there are only two things to worry about
Whether you will get well or whether you will die.
If you get well, there is nothing to worry about.
But if you die, there are only two things to worry about.
Whether you go to heaven or hell.
If you go to heaven, there is nothing to worry about.
But if you go to hell, you will be busy shaking hands
with old friends, you will have no time to worry .
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THERE IS NO ANSWERTHERE IS NOT GOING TO BE ANY ANSWER
THERE NEVER HAS BEEN ANY ANSWER
THAT IS THE ANSWER.
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Satisfaction is a product of satisFACTORY
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Take up Meditation. At least it is better than sitting and doing nothing.
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I locked my car and left the keys inside and I had to break the
window to get my wife out.
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A reporter asked a famous Judge, the secret behind his success.
''GOOD DECISIONS' replied the Judge.
"What is the secret behind your making good decisions " asked the reporter.
"EXPERIENCE' replied the judge, proudly.
The exasperated reporter asked, "What is the secret behind your experience...?"
" BAD DECISIONS..." replied the judge.--------------------------------------------------------------
Winston Churchill was visiting Gen.Montgomery, after the war. As per his habit, Monty wished the Prime Minister exactly at 9 pm, excused himself and was going to bed.
The Prime Minister asked " say Monty..What is the secret of your zeal and vigor..?" The General replied, " Sir.I never drink, never smoke and retire to bed early.." Thereupon, Monty asked Churchill, " Sir..May I know what is the secret of your energy and zeal.."
Churchill replied, " I drink like Hell...Smoke like Hell and never go to bed before 2 in the morning...."
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When you are alive you are selfish.. When you die you are self less.
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I never saw a cow, until I met my wife in her village.
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If you want to forget all your troubles, wear tight shoes. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The funeral procession passed through the street marked "one way" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Can you please take the boat, closer to the sunset...?
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You have to pull your weight.. I can't.
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" Is it Police station.. Come immediately..I have been shot....."Police: Ok.. Relax...How many times you have been shot.....?
"This is the first time, Sir........."
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Judge... I have reviewed this case. I have decided to give Rs.20,000 per month to your wife.
Man. Thank you..Your Honor... You are very nice and fair.... I will also try to send a few rupees to her every month, if possible...
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Best way to tackle a problem is to get away from it.
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He is not happy ever since he got over his anger.
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A Doctor with mental disorder is called Psychiatrist.
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My father has a split personality and I hate both of them.
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The reason I talk to myself is that I am the only one whose answers I accept.
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Unless you are crooked, you will not recognize crookedness. You will not call a tree crooked, unless you have some idea of a straight tree. You feel wet when you fall into water. A fish does not feel wet. A monkey does not know what is mischief. Feeling good or bad, right or wrong, when the whole show is senseless, is quite meaningless. Reacting against such events is ridiculous, quite absurd.. If there is evil, was it imported from outside the world. What is the parameter by which good or evil is judged ? Look at history of mankind. Double-crossing during battle is appreciated once and condemned in next. Single wife is admired in one case and multiple wives is accepted in another. What was right in one era was wrong in another era. Sometimes the Bible in the hand of one man is worse than a whiskey bottle in the hand of the other man. What is the point in raving and ranting over this ? You want to see the world through your window and want others also to see the world through your window.
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I seek to understand so that I may believe.
I believe, so that I may understand.
I believe that unless I first believe, I shall not understand.
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What you know, you know
What you do not know, you do not know
This is true wisdom..............................Confucius.
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He slammed his wife and kissed the door while going out.
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MERCURY is the God of weather and he is found in the thermometer
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What is your son going to be, when he graduates....?
An old man.
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What are the two famous plays of Shakespeare?
Romeo and Juliet.
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What has two heads, six feet, one tail and four ears ?A man on horse back.
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Why do birds fly southwards ?
Because.....they cannot walk...
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Why did Robin hood rob only the rich ?
Because the poor did not have money.
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Mother: I think it was the devil who suggested to you to pull little Alice's hair..
Boy: Yes I suppose so...But kicking her in the shin, was my own idea.
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Teacher: If I lay 2 eggs here and 3 eggs there, how many will be there, altogether?
Boy: I don't think you can do it.
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Contradictory proverbs.
Every Action has an equal and an opposite reaction. Similarly, every proverb has an equal and an opposite proverb! There always exists two sides of the same coin. U be the judge..
Every Action has an equal and an opposite reaction. Similarly, every proverb has an equal and an opposite proverb! There always exists two sides of the same coin. U be the judge..
Look before you leap. BUT Strike while the iron is hot.
Wise men think alike. BUT Fools seldom differ.
Slow and steady wins the race. BUT Time waits for no man.
Do it well, or not at all. BUT Half a loaf is better than none.
Silence is golden. BUT The squeaky wheel gets the grease.
Silence is golden. BUT The squeaky wheel gets the grease.
Birds of a feather flock together. BUT Opposites attract.
Doubt is the beginning of wisdom. BUT Faith will move mountains.
Great starts make great finishes. BUT It ain't over 'till it's over.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder. BUT Out of sight, out of mind.
Too many cooks spoil the broth. BUT Many hands make light work.
Practice makes perfect. BUT All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.
The pen is mightier than the sword. BUT Actions speak louder than words.
The best things in life are free things. BUT There's no such thing as a free lunch.
All good things come to those who wait. BUT Time and tide wait for no man.
Don't cross your bridges before you come to them. BUT Forewarned is forearmed.
You're never too old to learn. BUT You can't teach an old dog new tricks
What's good for the goose is good for the gander. BUT One man's food is another man's poison.
Hold fast to the words of your ancestors. BUT Wise men make proverbs and fools repeat them.
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WOES OF WOMEN
1.Nice men are Ugly
1.Nice men are Ugly
2.Handsome men are not nice
3.Handsome and Nice men are gay
4. Handsome and Nice men are married
5.Not handsome, but Nice men, have no money
1. Handsome men without Money are after our Money
2. Handsome men who are not so Nice think we are not beautiful.
3.Handsome and Nice men are gay
4. Handsome and Nice men are married
5.Not handsome, but Nice men, have no money
1. Handsome men without Money are after our Money
2. Handsome men who are not so Nice think we are not beautiful.
3. Nice men with money who think we are beautiful, are actually cowards
4. Not handsome but Nice men with Money, think that we are after their Money
4. Not handsome but Nice men with Money, think that we are after their Money
5. Handsome, Nice men with money are very shy and never make the first move.
6. Handsome, Nice men with money lose interest in us when we make the first move.
To Love is to suffer.
To avoid suffering, one must not love.
But then one suffers from not loving.
Therefore, to love is to suffer;
not to love is to suffer;
to suffer is to suffer.
To be happy, is to love.
To be happy, then, is to suffer,
but suffering makes one unhappy.
Therefore,
to be happy, one must love or love to suffer
or suffer from too much happiness.
Woody Allen
To avoid suffering, one must not love.
But then one suffers from not loving.
Therefore, to love is to suffer;
not to love is to suffer;
to suffer is to suffer.
To be happy, is to love.
To be happy, then, is to suffer,
but suffering makes one unhappy.
Therefore,
to be happy, one must love or love to suffer
or suffer from too much happiness.
Woody Allen
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